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Do you wear a bathrobe? Have you ever washed it? Do you towel off before you put it on, or do you don it whilst wet?

Questions: I have them. In this episode of Ask a Clean Person: The Podcast, my co-host Dave Lozo and I did a deep dive into your bathrobe behavior. I’d try to explain, but, yeah, either you’re reading this and you don’t need an explanation beyond just, “Jolie Kerr is a person who exists in this world,” or you have no idea and there’s no way we’re gonna help you to understand in a 500-word podcast recap. (To the former group: Hey pals, missed u every day.)

Okay, so here’s the thing I wanted to suss out: People are putting their robes on while wet, and there are poll results to prove it, but the why even? part of the equation was really the nut in need of cracking. Which we did, and then we also talked about how often you should be washing your robes.

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But also, questions: You have them. Since we were on the subject of things you know you probably should wash but maybe aren’t sure how, exactly, in the second segment, I decided to torment Dave by making him talk about hockey, with not one but two questions about how to clean a signed hockey jersey without washing the autographs away, and how to launder a dingy bracelet made from skate laces. It’s always a good time when the cleaning writer wants to talk about hockey and the hockey writer wants to talk about cleaning, I guess. It’s also pretty good when we fight about meaningless things, which is why I’d like you to sing to us of your lucky sports things/rituals, mostly so I can say that I’m right that wearing a “lucky” bracelet made out of skate laces is, like, a completely fine thing to do.

More importantly, would you like to help me punish Dave for inflicting his unforgivably bad Boston accent on the world by suggesting a whiter sentence than “At the family house in Maine”? Sure you would. Leave ‘em in the comments.

In our bonus episode, we talked about the connection between boogers and male confidence, magickal healing broth, superhero movies (THERE ARE TOO MANY. DON’T @ ME.), being pro-Affleck’s (fake, fine. FINE.) back tat, and ass-wiping. God, I cannot escape men talking to me about how they wipe their asses.

It’s good to be home, pals.

You can subscribe to Ask a Clean Person: The Podcast in Acast, iTunes, PlayerFM, Stitcher and all the other places you’d expect to find podcasts. For bonus episodes and all sorts of other cool rewards, head over to Patreon to help underwrite our show. Got Qs for the pod? Email Jolie with the subject line CLEANCAST.